Narcissists are only human: they too frown on others’ bad behavior

Despite their own self-centeredness, narcissists are not so willing to forgive others’ grandiose antics

Heidelberg | New York, 13 June 2016

Narcissists may be aware that they are a source of great irritation, yet continue to engage in socially frowned-upon behaviors. When narcissists are on the receiving end of someone else’s in-your-face antics and aggression, they are, interestingly enough, equally intolerant of such behavior, says Harry Wallace of Trinity University in the US. He led a team which showed that despite not minding how they antagonize others, narcissists are also unwilling to overlook similar behavior in anyone else. The study¹ is part of a special issue² on narcissism published in the June issue of Springer’s journal Current Psychology.

Narcissism is a complex, multidimensional personality trait. Narcissists often antagonize others with overt, grandiose claims about their self-worth, through the use of offensive language and aggression, and by making selfish, unethical decisions. They are often unapologetic about not playing by the rules, in part because they do not care much whether their views and actions are socially acceptable or not.

Wallace and his colleagues asked 213 undergraduates to answer online questionnaires about their willingness or tendency to engage in selfish, rude, hostile or unethical behavior, and their capacity to avoid being bothered about how it makes others feel. Participants then had to report how annoyed they would be if someone else perpetrated the same bad behavior they had just been questioned about. Lastly, they completed the forty-item Narcissistic Personality Inventory, which is a measure of grandiose narcissism in people.

Participants in general all reported feeling bothered by others’ bad behavior, irrespective of whether they themselves displayed narcissistic tendencies or not. Feeling bothered by commonplace antisocial behavior is therefore a conventional response and not a symptom of narcissism.
Wallace believes that the narcissists’ reaction in this regard is unfair, because their intolerance is high in proportion to their actual willingness to engage in the same behavior. “Our research demonstrates that narcissists are not uniquely critical of routine antisocial behaviors, and it provides the first direct comparison of narcissists’ willingness to bother and their tolerance of being bothered,” he said. “Narcissists’ unjust intolerance of bad behavior may not deserve a high rank of infamy within the pantheon of narcissistic faults, but it helps to provide a clearer picture of the mindset behind narcissists’ bothersome behavior.”

References:

1. Wallace, H.M. et al (2016). Grandiose Narcissism Predicts Willingness to Behave Badly, Without Proportional Tolerance for Others’ Bad Behavior, Current Psychology. DOI 10.1007/s12144-016-9410-x

2. Current Psychology, Volume 35, Issue 2, June 2016: Special issue: “Narcissism: Psychometrics and Social Behavior”